Comments on: The Bi-Professional Couple: A Conundrum Close to the Bone

By: Melanie

Melanie — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 02:57:03 +0000

I truly believe that couples can make it even when both have very successful careers. I have some friends where both the husband and wife make over 100k each a year, and yes there life is crazy to me, but they make it work. They have to schedule dates, and make appointments for every part of there life, but they are happy and it works for them.

By: dallas fashion stylist

dallas fashion stylist — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 22:35:36 +0000

This is something that I have to deal with when deciding if my boyfriend and I will be right for marriage. My boyfriend and I are very determined and motivated individuals that are both dedicated to our careers and sticking with them. We’ll see what happens though, only time will tell.

By: professional salary wages

professional salary wages — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 13:40:12 +0000

its hard to handle a relationship like that…to adapt where she is working also,its like your whole world has been changed..i think both party must talk to eachother how to communicate and meet each other in this kind of relationship.

By: John

John — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 21:44:20 +0000

I have friends and the wife is from Brazil, so in order to make things easier that started a business under his name, and they work together. She is a hard worker, and currently trying to learn English fluently. It is possible to make it work with Bi-Linguel couples you just have to think it through and get a game plan for success.

By: Fast Degree

Fast Degree — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 15:49:09 +0000

Both of my brothers married women of another culture and I have witnessed first-hand the compromises they have had to make in their marriages due to their careers. Thankfully, they have been able to work things out.

By: Rajeev

Rajeev — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 19:19:30 +0000

You’re independent and smart- and have apparently already compromised for most of your life (including for your family). Like you said, compromise goes both ways and if Enrico knows you for who you are (which, after nearly 20 years of marriage, I think he would) he probably understands this better than any of us posting here. But, for what it’s worth, I’ve done the long-distance thing (pre-marriage admittedly, though now married to the same) and I think it is possible to sustain the set-up that you currently have. Yes, you’ll be counting the frequent flyer miles (nothing new for you) but given your mutual respect and understanding, I see no reason why the current situation can’t continue. Maybe there’s more to the story that I’m missing and I’m just a blind optimist. But your “kid” is all grown up. Professors generally have long holidays between semesters (unless it’s different in Italy). And the world is a smaller place- I’m now more in touch with classmates from 20 years ago than I was the first year after I graduated from high school. Granted, being ‘in touch’ with one’s spouse and a HS pal are admittedly different. But, for all that, the rewards are that much better: if the both of you have what it takes to make it work, then it shows how special/robust/meaningful your relationship truly is- something that many living under the same roof may lack. Again, we may not have all the facts but, hey, advice is free Either way, thanks as always for the insightful articles and all the best!

By: Christina

Christina — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 20:18:55 +0000

Sounds like right now it would be best for him to come over here. At least it sounds like that’s what you are thinking. As a professor, it shouldn’t make a big difference where he researches and teaches. He might advance more in his career in a new place. Good luck! I hope it all works out and I don’t have to read about divorce procedures in this blog!

By: webmaster

webmaster — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 19:10:53 +0000

Thanks for the good wishes, but, no, the point is that in Italy I can’t find another job. Not one challenging and stimulating and worthy of my skills or at least paying a decent wage. That’s why I left. The same is true for many Italians, so I’m relatively lucky – I have a choice. And so does Enrico.

By: Christina

Christina — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 18:41:36 +0000

Addition: I moved 5 years ago from a well paying job in Dallas to Arkansas because my husband took a new job. I work now here in stable but not growing position for less money (and in the bible belt). My job is o.k., but I have more fun in all the projects outside my job. However, my former company in Dallas had been sold, people laid off, and the job situation is Dallas is not the best. So if I had stayed there, I might be out of a job… So for now, I enjoy my family, have fun in my projects, have a stable job and dream of moving out of the bible belt:)

By: Christina

Christina — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 18:34:11 +0000

Well, I would recommend to be careful not to grow apart too much. You can always find another job, another soul mate/life partner is much harder. You might not know how much it means until you loose it (him). Maybe you can convince him for a university career in US? The important thing is of course not to create resentment about loosing a career for either one.