Category Archives: bio

The Twitter Diaries: June 5-August 22, 2011

8 years ago: Buffy the Vampire Slayer – My Favorite Obsession @amber_benson#

4 years ago: Growing Up in Boarding School#

2 years ago: Producing Social Media#

hmm, seeing spam links on bit.ly again. Does anyone actually see spam when they click on a link of mine?#

Dice are rolling, the knives are out…#

Spending the afternoon with a bunch of hunky cowboys. (@ SFGMC Hootenanny!) #

…and I’ve got a ringside seat for my beloved Ethan Pope! (photo, top) #sfgmc#

Just posted a photo # (see top)

Never thought I’d hear deep in the heart of Texas in San Francisco#

She sounds like a girl. She IS a girl!#

#



Just posted a photo http://instagr.am/p/F9P0U/#

There won’t be bad hair days in heaven http://instagr.am/p/F9QGp/#

@SniperWulfzen it’s the #sfgmc – always a great show!#

I can never hear the song San Francisco without thinking Fuck Anita Bryant#

Spent the morning talking node.js, now at the #sfgmc concert, tomorrow off to Milan. Yes, this is my life.#

An appropriate sleeve for my #Kindle #


SFGMC Hootenanny! #sfgmc#

I’ll Be on My Way #sfgmc#

I’m at San Francisco International Airport (SFO) (275 S Airport Blvd, San Francisco) w/ 113 others http://4sq.com/mdteCD#

Sonuvabitch is BIG#


Just posted a photo http://instagr.am/p/GBtY9/#


.@jamescmcpherson Video can’t/shouldn’t totally replace the written word, each has its uses.#

Slept some on the plane, but it’s going to take a lot of coffee to convince my body it wants to be awake right now.#

@trochej Glad to do it. #illumos#

Long ago, I’d be disappointed if I arrived at an airport and there was no one to meet me. Then that became routine. But it’s still kinda sad#

Someone dear to me (and to many others) has died: Robert Alter-Alumni-Woodstock School, India #

Bob Alter Book Presentation#

so my site is definitely victim to a weird hack which sometimes shows spam pages. Any ideas?#

Back in Milan for the first time in > 2 years. Feels strange.#

@lucaconti Wow. You are very brave. Please come back alive! #Afghanistan#

#

Why, yes, I am going to torment you with food Sometimes it’s the little stuff that matters, like good bread #


Marinated raw seafood aka Italian ceviche


Pasta wih broccoli and clams. Never had this combo before, very good! #


besides eating lots of good food, spent the evening in conversation, in Italian, wih a former colleague. Warning up those language muscles#

Brendan’s blog mpstat videos http://bit.ly/k0zlrL#

#sfgmc YouTube – I’ll Be on My Way http://bit.ly/iKzCrF#

In case you were wondering: yes, it is very, very hard translating technical training on the fly.#

staying awake in hard to o…#

So thanks to a wise friend found out my blog has suffered the pharma hack. Removing it may be beyond my abilities alone, but I’ll have help.#

@billblum Thanks. I think I’d better wait til I’m not collapsing with jetlag to tackle that.#

@rbanffy the downside is you won’t be there to drink with them#

Massive jetlag plus air conditioning outage = about to go to sleep on the table#

Milan doorway #


I hadn’t intended this to be a food tour of Milan, but when knife-cut prosciutto and burrata appear, what ca (cont) http://deck.ly/~HHkVB#

I take my job as hostess very seriously, even when it’s no longer my country (if it ever was, even after 17 years).#

@LusciousPear Well, dammit, now I’m far away!#

@sogrady @vambenepe Absolutely. It’s the teaser to get people to click.#

@Pinboard This might help: http://bit.ly/igqeY8#

Just generated a #TweetCloud, my top words are: people, joyent, time – http://w33.us/9q1g (http://twitpic.com/5f7dna)#

@ryancnelson good for you!#

RT @rosannecash: Happy Birthday, Kris Kristofferson, 75 today. As dear to me as a brother. http://lockerz.com/s/113102378#

This one’s for @jeffreytaylor #


A hard day’s work deserves… a giant mozzarella, flown in fresh from Naples. #

Two branzini and an orata. We ate the orata, or one of its kin. #

Crochette (potatoes n stuff, breaded and fried and YUMMY) #

@jeffreytaylor honestly, BlueBottle is as good – except for the ridiculous lines. and the price.#

@NomdeB it was an outdoor table, otherwise wouldn’t have been a smoking area. But no one was smoking.#

Absolutely miserable with allergies. Probably just as well I’m spending the weekend it Milton Keynes instead of on Lake Como.#

Wedding Vows in days both wretched and joyous, from this day forward, as long as you wish this from me http://bit.ly/jrYR98#

@craigmorgan Oh, I know – have spent a LOT of time there. But it’s where my dad lives (after a lifetime in many more interesting places).#

Allergies so bad I want to claw my eyes out. Now I remember one of the things I hate about Milan.#

Sorry, Netflix is not available in this country yet. At least let me queue up a movie I’d like to watch when I’m back in the US! Sheesh.#

@RaggedPoint Lived in Italy 17 years, it’s all sadly familiar. I know the workarounds, but want it fixed at the source. #netflix#

YouTube – Bryan Cantrill interviewed at Velocity 2011 http://bit.ly/mUdUVO#

Tried to get better allergy drugs, pharmacy closes for 3 HOURS at lunchtime. And you ask if I’m nostalgic for my former life in Italy…?#

.@pfuetz Yes, but as a US-based customer, why not give me access to my movie database from elsewhere, even if I can’t watch til I’m in US?#

.@pfuetz I understand the (stupid) restrictions on viewing the films. All I want to do is queue up something to watch when I’m back in SF.#

@pfuetz Got that. 😉#

in Italy, order a cappuccino with your meal. It alerts the waiter that you know what you’re doing http://econ.st/lE1gJk#

Fantastic Art Deco gate in Milan. #


YouTube – Oh, What a Beautiful Morning #sfgmc http://bit.ly/iH5VHS#

#SFGMC with very beautiful music inspired by Brokeback Mountain – Meet Me on the Mountain http://bit.ly/kpWRCB#

Up early, but got ~6 hours of sleep, 3x the night before. Busy day ahead, starting to pack up my stuff at the former family home in Lecco…#

…then ~3 hr schlep to Malpensa to get a 2-hr flight to Luton to visit my dad. Yeah, this is my glamorous biz trip to Italy.#

@NomdeB Don’t know how much I’ll be able to bring, just doing excess baggage. Shipping from Italy ridiculously expensive.#

http://t.co/wWtFsCX#

Milan getting ready for Pride. Sorry I’ll miss it both there and in SF. http://t.co/hwUY7wc#

Milan Central station has had an upgrade, but the trains… http://t.co/FqoMXKh#

Had time to kill at Stazione Centrale in Milan today. Can’t believe I got this photo. #


Very cool purse: upcycled soda can tabs, crocheted together. #

Lecco to Milton Keynes: car + train + train + bus + plane + taxi = 8 HOURS. Europe makes itself feel large by making travel inconvenient.#

@wayfaringrob My dad was a hippie, doen that count?#

Pizzocheri! http://bit.ly/3eI9Pd (and the lady at Taverna ai Poggi remembered me,). #

Gallery: Milan Central Station http://bit.ly/mPobUk#

Damn. Gonna have to struggle to clean out this pharma hack – affecting my traffic badly. Fuckers.#

This day in 1981 I graduated from Woodstock School http://bit.ly/izmKcO – Yes, we’re having a big party, later in the year.#

6 years ago: Transport Surprises on Lake Como http://bit.ly/iRAXu8#

Since I can’t be there this year: last year’s video of SFGMC in SF Pride http://bit.ly/9qd5RM#

@bubbva Haven’t got that far yet, trying to follow these instructions: http://bit.ly/dfxwa0#

one of the tersest and more remarkable rejections of conservative economics ever penned by a conservative http://bit.ly/mwPBxf#

the UK isn’t any better for my allergies right now, may even be worse. Vacation in the Sahara is beginning to sound very good!#

The Twitter Diaries: June 5-18, 2011 http://bit.ly/iV1uwO#

@willbldrco Right now deep Sahara is sounding pretty good.#

@CommunispaceCEO Maybe because of people who use Google’s search box as their URL bar?#

Yes, I’ve been awake since 3 am. At least in this timezone. No matter, must get up about this time for the next 2 days, + travel, packing.#

@trine Yes, very Norwegian! 😉#

added the full photo gallery to: Villa Monastero: Varenna, Lake Como http://bit.ly/bkNp4s#

Trip home already looking like a hassle. 1st leg is on Alitalia, so KLM directs me to their site to check in. And they won’t let me.#

@riccardo_iommi I wish I could say I have missed Italy, but the frustrations still outweigh the joys for me.#

Closing my Italian bank account. They need 3 days to figure out how much money is left and give it back to me. Isn’t this a BANK?…#

…but, in true Italian style, they were accommodating and got it done anyhow.#

my daughter is earning more in her starter job at Apple in Austin than I did in my last job in Milan. Hell YES I wanted her out of Italy!#

Need expert mode for customer service hold lines, to NOT tell me things I already know but cannot do. If I coulda done it myslf, I woulda.#

And to think I used to love traveling.#

4 hrs sleep + 7 hrs travel + 4 hrs packing = desperate need for a nap. Sadly, I am vey bad at napping.#

deeply tired, but will I be able to sleep for the 3.5 hours available to me tonight?#

No athlete, I excel at the travel triathlon: baggage pack and lift, airport dash, seat collapse.#

The Dutch have a charming habit of assuming that I am Dutch. But then, so do the Germans, English, Scots… Everyone except Americans!#

This is more like it. Thanks @KLM – trip not a hassle after all. That upgrade was very well timed. http://t.co/uZqJtO4#

Trip far better than feared, on most fronts. But glad and relieved to be home.#

@ditucci @nonstick O gonna pay you the same regardless, if you’re already an employee anyway#

I feel a bit out of focus. Too much to process from this trip. Thankful for jetlag – takes the edge off.#

Summary of my visit to Italy: good friends, great food, but I don’t miss living there. In so many ways, I need more than la dolce vita…#

…I couldn’t afford la dolce vita anyway. What I had was hardly dolce – and this is true for most ordinary Italians http://bit.ly/ifORts#

.@NomdeB Very true. It’s never been US vs Italy (or anywhere else) but where can I have the most of what makes me happy in one place?#

Of course we all know that in the Real Italy, everyone sings opera all the time http://bit.ly/cxCt6t#

.@NomdeB Wait til you see my apartment in SF. 😉 I like living small – less to clean, less unnecessary crap because there’s just no room.#

Fuck. Site still hacked.#

Trying to fix horrible eye irritation from seasonal allergies. (@ Dr. Bert M.D. Office) http://4sq.com/iKBsxd#

@izs I’ll take real geekspeak over marketing babble any day.#

@deeharvey Talk about taking candy from strangers. 😉#

I’m awake! I’m awake! No, I’m not…#

.@NathanFillion Well, then, let me introduce you to my Italian daughter and long-time fan @RossellaLaeng#

Jetlag does weird things to me. Was’nt hungry most of the day, then bolted down Chipotle tacos, chips, guac, & an entire Lindt pistachio bar#

If I can’t clear my site of the pharma hack, I’ll be faced with the interesting challenge of getting traffic without search engines.#

…and/or the search engines will need to get smart enough to realize that I don’t write about (ahem) male enhancement drugs.#

RT @benr: Best. Video. Ever. http://youtu.be/KCSA7kKNu2Y – I only have a few friends left like this, thank Zod…#

Ok, the chocolate bar is explained. Hormones. Gah!#

It Just Doesn’t Matter http://bit.ly/jUXHRP#

@ianhf That’s certainly more pithy than what I had in mind.#

The Org Charts Of All The Major Tech Companies (Humor) http://read.bi/iSJcRh#

Huh. I have just been asked permission to include this artcle in a college textbook: http://bit.ly/mEtJxu#

why does Google+ think I know Michael Arrington?#

Finding room for the 3 suitcases of random stuff I brought from my old home in Italy. Gave bales of clothing to charity – little fit anymore#

4 years ago: Italys Amazing Summer Fruits http://bit.ly/jPEBIB#

@ryah You dared to use your phone in a foriegn country, right?#

Here and now, worlds collide. http://t.co/wvmoZHq#

I’m at Joyent (345 California St, #2000, San Francisco) http://4sq.com/j2xRYx#

My one meeting of this pre-holiday Friday is over. Time for beer yet?#

@vdotw AP English, actually… now trying to figure out what that’s worth.#

We are firing the women so they can stay at home and look after the children…what they bring in is a second income. http://bit.ly/isN9rD#

.@italylogue @michellefabio Excuse me while I go and vomit… http://bit.ly/luOWr1#

This is seriously cool. – MySQL Query Latency with DTrace 2 http://bit.ly/kv3IwM – Thanks, we think so, too. 😉#

@saraford That’s why I wanted my daughter OUT of there. Now she works for Apple in Austin. Mamma knows best. 😉#

xkcd: Hofstadter http://bit.ly/kBxH95#

@denizrende Put. Down. The. Keyboard. Go have some fun!#

Feeling emotionally dizzy. Had a lot to process in the last 12 days.#

New/recovered wall decorations… http://t.co/A2pXy8k#

I just love Ravana’s shit-eatin’ grin. http://t.co/SNrxzm6#

@Myrna_SF we can certainly arrange to meet – I don’t have particular plans thru the week. Looking forward to it!#

@pelegri I recall ~4000 blogs listed, but not all were active at the same time.#

Flowers in the Windows http://bit.ly/lEa22r#

.@pelegri Sun’s attitude towards employee blogging was even more significant. Don’t be stupid – and they trusted us for the rest.#

Jetlag and/or allergies… I feel as if a truck has parked on top of me.#

Id like to think that the most prosperous nation in human history can have both freedom and security. http://wapo.st/jR0KNQ#

Treating monogamy as the main indicator of a successful marriage gives us unrealistic expectations http://nyti.ms/mOuTOV#

Forget something, Larry? http://t.co/txGXGfj#

2 years ago: President Lula of Brazil Meets OpenSolaris http://bit.ly/j7uehw#

5 years ago: Watching Football http://bit.ly/lteIue#

6 years ago: International Marching Show Bands in Lecco http://bit.ly/jVXBMo#

4 years ago: Biopsy: Digging to China Through My Breast http://bit.ly/k07qhb#

1 year ago: A Dinner Party in Wonderland http://bit.ly/bfqT8R#

Fine with That http://bit.ly/kMNXDT#

I’m at Joyent w/ @davidpaulyoung http://4sq.com/ripNiM#

oh my. I’m going to Austin Friday. It’s 50 degrees hotter there than here.#

I am very happy to announce my new position as SmartOS Community Manager at Joyent. Watch this space for news!#

@chrisridd We couldn’t live without each other. 😉#

…and it’s kinda cool to be able to say My new boss is on Wikipedia.#

@bubbva What goes around comes around or Everything old is new again – take your pick. 😉#

@italylogue ouch, I still owe you that…#

@sogrady @bcantrill does? I’ll see what I can do#

@UnLogikal That there will be a community. 😉#

@sogrady well, I do have a little something already stashed away…#

@sh1mmer You suffer so for your art.#

@sh1mmer Ok then, you’re forgiven. 😉 I’ll tell @brendangregg he needs a firepit next time he’s writing a book.#

I don’t actually need Skype, FB, etc to remind me that my daughter was born 22 years ago today!#

.@Sarahcarr Relevant becuz, the world over, women are told they invite rape by dressing provocatively. With this woman, there’s no excuse.#

@CetasAnalytics @LusciousPear Reminds me of a scene from Bring It On.#

@rosannecash We have similar taste in men, I see… #BridgesKristoffersonByrne#

maximizers are less happy than satisficers. http://t.co/2gnasE3 http://t.co/oDU41Tx#

@UnLogikal it may, can you give me more details? firstname@joyent dot com#

If I’m still in bed with a cup of coffee but answering email etc., does that count as work?#

@fitzage my fingers are doing stuff, not sure the brain is connected yet#

Don’t know if I’m this is a summer cold, or allergies. Either way, should be better is Austin (currently enjoying low pollen counts and HOT)#

To see the new node meetup videos in fullscreen, go here: joyent’s Channel – YouTube http://t.co/bGpvqs2#

Just got yelled at by a taxi driver for not tipping him enough. Apprently driving me to the airport is doing me a favor.#

Opted out of the scanner, but didn’t get the promised pat-down. Should I feel cheated?#

I guess SFO wifi has a time limit bug doesn’t tell you that up front. Graceful.#

I’m at Cathedral of Junk (4422 Lareina Dr., Austin) [pic]: http://t.co/NieRQmW#

http://t.co/zJvr4p2#

WS India – Hostel Parkour – YouTube http://t.co/UxzglMz#

@elijahwright They gave you the good drugs, huh?#

Austins Cathedral of Junk http://t.co/dY7NWE5#

A pattern in my life: if I hang on long enough, stuff I want to do anyway becomes part of my job.#

Part of my problem with shopping is the obnoxious music they play in stores.#

Iced coffee at this Starbucks in Texas is nasty.#

Daughters neighbors have peacocks. Live ones. Only in Austin…#

At way too much at Fogo de Chao in Austin, and wish I hadn’t. But at least I didn’t have to look out for soy or peanuts there.#

Had occasion today to reflect upon how happy it makes me to work closely with frighteningly smart people, and to learn from them.#

http://t.co/wDtjCb4#

Barbacoa tacos: Sunday brunch, Tejas style!#

@jorbsd Welcome home. 😉#

digesting good food and mimosas, listening to fun music, doing work. Sorta.#

Top 10 Things Texas Gov. Rick Perry Doesnt Want You To Know About Him | ThinkProgress http://t.co/wRTKxf1#

@deirdresm Oh, crap, are scarves hip? I’ll have to stop wearing them.#

http://t.co/rF8gvF4#

http://t.co/hL1gUoL#

To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. #

It would be really, really nice if I could sleep.#

my new home: SmartOS.org http://t.co/LPktWhC#

Come on down to http://t.co/j2s0kvf – we’re giving it all away!#

@billblum Yes, we like to know exactly how much ass we tick, and how hard. 😉#

this by special request of @sogrady: Computing History with Bryan Cantrill SmartOS.org http://t.co/paXzYW0#

@urbanturbanguy http://t.co/F2rpaCA #Joynet#

Screenshots SmartOS.org http://t.co/5MQJAGa#

@bcantrill waitaminute… you have slides done HOURS before your talk? Did the world end? #illumos #kvmforum#

@pelegri http://t.co/InJpf4c#

Sitting here in limbo (@ Magnolia Cafe South w/ 3 others) [pic]: http://t.co/vXRp605#

@mfernest root/root I believe#

@joerussbowman oops#

SmartOS Downloads, Day 1 SmartOS.org http://t.co/xDZw0Z6#

I feel as if we should be singing We will, we will ROCK YOU!#

@3rdEden They wake up earlier, and Asia hasn’t hit yet.#

@talios http://t.co/eNjVl9f username: rootpassword: root#

Just ordered a pink purse. That’s got to help something, right?#

@DeirdreS root/root works#

Dinner http://t.co/zzSWTMR#

The view from the pool on a hot Texas evening http://t.co/lnTqK4V#

Cupcake run successfully completed! http://t.co/abqantd#

@xenbu eBay#

I’m about to run out of parents.#

Over the last five years, he says, I’ve had the pleasure of gutting the Sun kernel team. http://t.co/sjUGw0B#

@shawnferry Me, neither.#

@trochej ? #SmartOS #OpenIndiana#

@trochej Jason? I’m not gonna tell him how to behave. And, at this time in my life, this month especially, I have no use for subtlety.#

I’m at Austin Bergstrom International Airport (AUS) (3600 Presidential Blvd., Texas Hwy. 71, Austin) w/ 20 others http://t.co/ljGWK85#

@trochej for a small company with little marketing budget, it’s a very good strategy. We can’t plaster the world’s airports with billboards.#

@Gibheer not yet, but soon#

Waiting for a final phone call. The glamorous international life really sucks when you are far away from your loved ones at the wrong time#

@fabiokung Nah, we don’t bite. 😉 #smartos #kvm #illumos#

My father has died.#

at least I have him, too, on video: What am I Doing Here? An American Civilian in Vietnam http://t.co/Oy4ejzb#

@saraford We’ll be taking his ashes to New Orleans at some point and hopefully having a proper jazz funeral. It’s what he wanted.#

@jimpick Thanks, I wish he’d gotten more recorded or written down. But he was convinced he was immortal.#

From the rockin’ of the cradle to the rollin’ of the hearse, the goin’ up was worth the comin’ down http://t.co/vlswrAp#

Al Straughan, 1939-2011 http://t.co/yZimaj3#

Ryans Rough Guide to the SmartOS ISO SmartOS.org http://t.co/KasWO3R#

@jeffreytaylor So can I get some chorines to come to NOLA and sing I’ll be on my way ? I think that would be appropriate.#

@jimpick Yes, in many ways I’m definitely my father’s daughter, and will probably become more so.#

@lkateley thanks. But we’re still on for tomorrow – distraction is good.#

It appears that mourning does absolutely nothing to cure the common cold. You’d think I could be excused from physical annoyances right now.#

Spinning up SmartMachines to house SmartOS community communications vehicles. Yes, we drink our own champagne.#

Heartfelt thanks to everyone for the thoughts and hugs. I’m at work, which for me is good therapy and distraction.#

work in progress: SmartOS Technical FAQs SmartOS.org http://t.co/XkRBwLE#

@rbanffy w00t!#

@openindiana Hey, whoever is in charge of community for you guys, we should talk.#

Slipping back into my community manager role (something I’ve been doing off and on for >15 years). Tools change, techniques not much.#

…and this community appears to be moving at lightspeed!#

@mikemaccana sorry, we’re a bit behind schedule on that, but working on it. Please see http://t.co/Vo13EzS#

@jeffreytaylor Or you can just not watch broadcast TV. 😉#

A man walks down the streetIt’s a street in a strange worldMaybe it’s the Third World…http://t.co/02so6jD#

@rbanffy I can’t take credit for that, but I like it better than dogfood!#

Ain’t it funny how we all turned out – I guess we are the people our parents warned us about http://t.co/FVCdUdW#

Father forgive us for what we must doYou forgive us we’ll forgive youWe’ll forgive each other till we both turn blue http://t.co/XzrdY3P#

the banks are made of marble,With a guard at every door,the vaults are stuffed with silver,That we all sweated for. http://t.co/ZnP9VEC#

SmartOS USB Key Image Now Available SmartOS.org http://t.co/nIpOCSj#

community contribution: Serving SmartOS from your PXE server http://t.co/GIzcr6B#

Are Michele Bachmann’s Views About ‘Christian Submission’ Even More Extreme Than She’s Letting On? | | AlterNet http://t.co/iJxR6fc#

@Graftolistic do you have screenshots of the OSs you’ve booted under SmartOS KVM? Would love to show those on the smartor.org blog #joyent#

Apparently grief is like jetlag: the first day I feel fine, then everything goes to pieces.#

@italylogue Thanks – it’s good to get advice from one who knows. Unfortunately, this is something most of us go through sooner or later…#

@saraford thanks#

@openindiana yes, wd love to, and I’d like to know how to explain to people that they can get the new OI release with KVM. Follow me here!#

@jacques kayak.com#

could I just sleep for a week?#

@billblum Fortunately, discussing is easier than porting! Talk is cheap, after all. 😉#

@jeffreytaylor Indeed. Dose that get a golf clap? 😉 #shameless#

How Rich is Too Rich? : Sam Harris http://t.co/FDBjzu3#

@storagebod please tell us more! How do you like it? There’s a feature you may be esp interested in: http://t.co/EKsh2Rs#

My Dads Death http://t.co/crioblK#

@hridaybala Thanks. Yes, he was rather amazing. I’ll have more to say about that in future…#

The Tea Partys generals rank and file are more concerned about putting God in government. http://t.co/rJ3sdtO#

@brendangregg OMFG#

Suddenly, in a moment of blurry eyed recognition, DTrace, ZFS, and SMF become very sexy… you become a devotee. http://t.co/YQ6UeNF#

According to Twitter: Similar to you @bcantrill Bryan Cantrill#

@gsyoungblood No worries – we’re all working very closely together and plan to continue to do so. We want the whole ecosystem to thrive!#

@jeffreytaylor the patent wars employ lawyers#

More OSes Booted Under SmartOS KVM SmartOS.org http://t.co/vIJE3q6#

RT @wattersjames: The tweet is mightier than the press release. – amen!#

I’m not depressed, I’m just sad.#

International travel for a funeral between UK and US holiday weekends, covering expenses for 3, with a weak . This just may not happen.#

@lderezinski Exactly, and for international travel bereavement fares often just don’t exist.#

For family tensions, undercurrents, and drama, funerals outdo even weddings.#

@jeffreytaylor If it was up to me… We need to catch up this week. Over many stiff drinks. As you say: it’s all going in the script!#

.@arne_d Have you met our team? @bcantrill @brendangregg @dapsays @pijewski @rmustacc + Jelinek, Bruning, others non-Sun but eq brilliant#

.@arne_d …and it’s not just us. There’s also a nascent SmartOS community, and the Illumos and OpenIndiana communtites. So… yes!#

RT @adambusch: Funerals are not for the dead.#

@SethGreen Hmm, I thought you were an alphabet letter-of-the-month club delivery man.#

I didn’t know grief would be so damned exhausting.#

Oh, with everything else going on, I forgot to mention: I started my personal newsletter and website about 10 years ago, in July, 2001#

10 years ago: How to Eat Like an Italian: Fundamentals of the Mediterranean Diet http://t.co/qZc5uva#

4 years ago, video and photos: Roasted Green Chiles at the Las Vegas (NM) Flea Market http://t.co/rErgU6v#

2 years ago at OSCON, Jack Adams and Sriram Natarajan on Using DTrace to Analyze Your Webstack http://t.co/C52rdg0#

a year ago I translated: Learn Italian in Song: Tu Vuo Fa o Talebano http://t.co/cCAVcPe#

PBS was showing folk music. Made me weep for singing with my dad, and for a time when people believed music could make a difference.#

New SmartOS Wiki SmartOS.org http://t.co/A8T3iaj#

seems somehow appropriate at the moment: Deep Purple – Smoke On The Water – Montreux 2006 – YouTube http://t.co/97HlPYm#

post by Max Bruning: Its here! KVM on Illumos SmartOS.org http://t.co/RBJXhct#

Explaining cocks http://t.co/XS2ScsJ#

.@bobthomson70 Don’t tell me we’re going to need a heatmap for this, to add the linguinstic/regional 4th dimension…#

You’ll see it’s all a show, keep ’em laughing as you go…http://t.co/yUZJN7W#

Learned from my dad’s untimely demise: I should start writing my autobiography NOW. Problem is, much of it strains credibility.#

@urbanturbanguy Baingan bharta would get me to show up, but chocolate is also good (not at the same time).#

@mfernest You’re welcome. Good contributions should always be recognized. #InternetPresenceOhYeah#

The Twitter Diaries: Aug 23-31, 2011

(In reverse chronological order.)

DeirdreS: @jasonh Looks like a wallpaper pattern
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/109392325771395072

2011-08-31 20:21:19

^ Fill in the blank as you deem appropriate.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108997818932396032

2011-08-31 19:31:28

DeirdreS: I don’t have any recordings of my dad singing. Damn.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108985272586350592

2011-08-31 14:20:11

^ Going out in style
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108906937449590784

2011-08-31 09:08:10

^ Yes, that is a bamboo casket.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108828412440887296

2011-08-31 09:06:57

DeirdreS: @rosannecash is Kristofferson on Twitter? I’d like him to know we’ll be playing his music tomorrow in memory of my dad
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108616980201869312

2011-08-30 18:23:30

DeirdreS: I’m supposed to say something at my father’s funeral tomorrow. I’m good with words, but this time have no idea what to say.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108605779887669248

2011-08-30 03:57:00

“sincere religious believers have the most to lose if faith becomes a matter of poll-time dogma and lung power.”
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108387719150960640

2011-08-29 22:59:20

DeirdreS: RT @billblum: RT @rudepundit: No shit Irene was a message from God, @teambachmann. The message was “Climate change is real, you fucking …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108312807174455297

2011-08-29 21:27:25

DeirdreS: RT @scottherson: Job opportunity: Inside Sales Manager at Joyent – San Francisco Bay Area #jobs http://t.co/Xvq8naW
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108289677647294464

2011-08-29 21:20:36

DeirdreS: @OrganizeFISH I’m sorry to hear that you also have reason to mourn right now, did I miss news about you somewhere?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108287959631020032

2011-08-29 16:46:03

DeirdreS: @KatieS and who pays the bills? Nice work if you can afford it…
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108218867184185344

2011-08-29 16:40:39

DeirdreS: Meeting a friend. This is head-bending. (@ Apple Store w/ 5 others)
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108217511429939200

2011-08-29 15:39:58

DeirdreS: @metadaddy I’m in the UK, so this isn’t an Americanism. And I’ve seen (and drunk) 2 different brands.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108202235921563648

2011-08-29 15:36:05

DeirdreS: @metadaddy The label says “pear cider’, I’m not fussed either way.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108201261949648896

2011-08-29 15:23:01

DeirdreS: Drinking this lovely British invention, pear cider.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108197973384642560

2011-08-29 15:22:16

DeirdreS: @jasonh I’ll take one. please
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108197781679775744

2011-08-29 15:04:47

DeirdreS: Neko lives! Awww… Node Neko by Team-IIJ
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108193385835270145

2011-08-29 14:59:01

DeirdreS: Wow, looks like some fun and even useful stuff was created this weekend: Entries — Node.js Knockout
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108191930948657153

2011-08-29 12:28:37

Whether they realize it or not, listening may be the most valuable thing anyone can do.”
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108154081176072192

2011-08-29 11:46:04

DeirdreS: RT @PJCrowley: What we saw prior to and during #HurricaneIrene were engaged and competent governments in action. As citizens, this is wh …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108143377182240768

2011-08-29 09:54:43

DeirdreS: @lderezinski Sorry to hear it, thinking of you.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/108115352906510336

2011-08-28 20:43:45

DeirdreS: @node_knockout not outside the US it ain’t 🙁
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107916300612943872

2011-08-28 20:43:17

DeirdreS: @lderezinski didn’t you just say schools will be closed tomorrow?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107916181247238146

2011-08-28 18:41:58

DeirdreS: @smaffulli Where are you going?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107885653022347265

2011-08-28 15:52:23

DeirdreS: left ear completely and painfully blocked only heightens my sense of dislocation from the world.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107842974121074688

2011-08-28 15:50:54

DeirdreS: arrived London. Must have slept some on the plate, not nearly enough
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107842602723835905

2011-08-28 15:46:59

DeirdreS: @jimpick Funny, seems as if there ought bo be some sort of Google memorial marker
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107841614587760640

2011-08-28 02:02:51

^ You can’t tell in this photo but one of the pilots is a woman. I’m always absurdly pleased by this.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107634216975609856

2011-08-28 00:57:43

DeirdreS: at SFO. Again. Would really have preferred to stay home…
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107617823093817345

2011-08-28 00:51:08

DeirdreS: RT @StorageMojo: SmartOS.org: Zones, ZFS, DTrace and KVM in 1 OS. Run Windows & Linux apps in VMs. From Joyent. Cool!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107616168658993153

2011-08-27 23:30:12

DeirdreS: RT @node_knockout: wow, 24 teams have already deployed.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107595801546600449

2011-08-27 23:26:12

DeirdreS: RT @timfoster: Being thankful for #dtrace + Python in Solaris – I don’t have to do lots of that stuff, phew #kiwipycon
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107594794016051201

2011-08-27 23:25:00

DeirdreS: RT @peteryorke: Scaling WordPress in the JoyentCloud Part 2
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107594491950665728

2011-08-27 23:24:45

DeirdreS: @fitzage did you get the squirrel butt?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107594430025957376

2011-08-27 19:25:32

DeirdreS: Completely freaky: I can find a Google maps photo of my dad’s house, and be quite certain my dad was there when they took the picture.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107534228815749120

2011-08-27 16:59:16

The experience is brutally physiological: It literally takes your breath away. This makes grief hard to communicate. 
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107497417808691201

2011-08-27 16:42:36

DeirdreS: @hudsonette Oh no! I was already feeling sorry for people with BoM tix for tonight, didn’t know I actually knew any of them.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107493226553933824

2011-08-27 15:40:17

DeirdreS: @dexterous Good work! 😉 #dtrace #devopsdays #bangalore
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107477542616825857

2011-08-27 03:54:15

DeirdreS: Lesson for the day: At least one Wikipedia editor contradicts himself.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107299861979856896

2011-08-26 22:04:44

DeirdreS: @ryancnelson That’s a fantastic idea. You can use my big monitor if you want #joyent #nodeknockout
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107211902819639297

2011-08-26 21:46:16

DeirdreS: .@SFist Now I know why I never need to go to Burning Man. I attended plenty of the equivalent at a far too tender age with /my/ parents.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107207258852687872

2011-08-26 18:58:50

DeirdreS: RT @robinbloor: Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm #humor – That actually is true.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107165119515082752

2011-08-26 18:56:58

DeirdreS: RT @corloff: RT @poultrykeeper: Bet with Boss. He says Twitter is a waste of time. He will give 50p per RT I get but I give him £10 if I …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107164651816615936

2011-08-26 18:48:32

DeirdreS: @lderezinski Impossible. These very noisy machines are very close to my desk.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107162529125498880

2011-08-26 18:44:35

experiences that afford us new behaviors and engender new beliefs are the ones we remember.” Fast Company
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107161535570395136

2011-08-26 18:34:37

DeirdreS: time to dust off my London tube skills
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107159028257398784

2011-08-26 18:24:12

^ We can pretty much write off the workday…
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107156404313391104

2011-08-26 12:28:24

DeirdreS: this is the last time I play travel agent for the whole damned family
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107066865297264640

2011-08-26 12:10:04

DeirdreS: When on hold, it’s probably for something I can’t do online, so the messages about how I could be doing this online are just cruel mockery
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107062251101495296

2011-08-26 12:00:07

DeirdreS: Oh, fuck. Daughter is supposned to change flights on the way to London for my dad’s funeral… Saturday night at Dulles. Fuck fuck fuck.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107059748033146882

2011-08-26 11:23:56

DeirdreS: @linuxdaddy I’m arriving Sunday, only in town til Tuesday morning. Got some time on Monday? I’ll be out and about.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/107050642211749888

2011-08-26 06:08:13

DeirdreS: I’m not crazy about the violin, but I loved this post
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106971187158065152

2011-08-26 05:40:37

DeirdreS: @metadaddy Oh, we’ll get there. I bought myself Legos, for me, but at least I’m pretty good about cleaning them up.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106964243760431104

2011-08-26 05:14:54

DeirdreS: RT @musicjulia: Marcel Chouteau: A Hurricane is Coming Up the Coast.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106957769231446017

2011-08-26 05:13:49

DeirdreS: I hate stubbing my toes so much, you’d think I would learn not to do it!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106957500699512834

2011-08-26 05:11:12

DeirdreS: @jeffreytaylor I am far from an expert on this, but I think the first step is to accept that you actually are hot.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106956839220031488

2011-08-26 03:47:21

DeirdreS: And more! How an earthquake affects hard drive and website performance | ExtremeTech
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106935740285452289

2011-08-26 03:46:15

DeirdreS: @missbhavens seriously, wasp stings hurt like a sonofabitch, and on your head…! ouch!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106935460315660289

2011-08-26 03:43:49

DeirdreS: @brendangregg: human earthquake!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106934847347490816

2011-08-26 03:24:02

DeirdreS: RT @ben1mal: Alright, last chance for a lonely Padawan to join up with a few good Jedi Knights in SF and win a MacBook Air. Just sayin. …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106929870952611840

2011-08-26 03:23:07

DeirdreS: @missbhavens There, there. Support support support. 😉
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106929641062797312

2011-08-26 00:28:02

DeirdreS: RT @openindiana: @vv111y We’re definitely very pro smartos and are very supportive of Joyent’s contributions – and vice-versa!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106885577361731584

2011-08-25 23:39:06

DeirdreS: @oneofth3m Cool, I look forward to seeing it in October
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106873262419607552

2011-08-25 21:56:16

DeirdreS: free (and amazing performances in the Bay Area Sept 8-17 Project Bandaloop | Bound(less)
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106847386516725760

2011-08-25 19:15:26

Leonard Cohen – Chelsea Hotel – YouTube
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106806911726403584

2011-08-25 18:38:28

DeirdreS: RT @joyent: Joyent is now part of the Open Virtualization Alliance
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106797608596553728

2011-08-25 18:19:34

Kinda hard to believe Leonard Cohen has outlived my dad – Hallelujah – YouTube
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106792849361739776

2011-08-25 17:37:07

DeirdreS: RT @mcavage: @massivescale it’s for real. We’re building the next generation of cloud user management on ldapjs+riak @joyent.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106782166482034688

2011-08-25 17:13:33

DeirdreS: @mcavage so you follow @rosannecash , right?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106776237212573696

2011-08-25 16:39:40

DeirdreS: RT @mcavage: LDAP and Node.js. Boom.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106767711174004736

2011-08-25 16:26:02

I learned about swearing responsibly from my dad long ago, when I was about 10 years old
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106764281432899585

2011-08-25 15:46:24

DeirdreS: That road you didn’t take? Sometimes it turns out to be a damn good thing you didn’t.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106754306308456448

2011-08-24 22:51:25

DeirdreS: @melanierenzulli damn, you’re right #SteveJobs #SteveJobs #SteveJobs
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106498877850517504

2011-08-24 21:57:36

DeirdreS: RT @brendangregg: the DTrace book has sold over 1,000 paper copies; thanks to everyone who got one!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106485332412862464

2011-08-24 21:41:58

DeirdreS: @linuxdaddy thank @johnnysunshine – it’s his work
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106481398130544640

2011-08-24 21:09:37

DeirdreS: Slides now available, too! Video: SmartOS: The Modern Operating System
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106473256852267008

2011-08-24 20:45:21

DeirdreS: @jeffspross @johnnysunshine …or female, or non-white…
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106467151799521280

2011-08-24 20:18:10

DeirdreS: .@jeffspross And, conversely, the idea that if you’re poor, you somehow deserve it.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106460310424141825

2011-08-24 19:18:41

DeirdreS: How to Use the SmartOS ISO Image – SmartOS Documentation – SmartOS Wiki
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106445341934624768

2011-08-24 19:17:18

DeirdreS: @edsai There’s always the marketing department. 😉
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106444991144001536

2011-08-24 18:38:38

DeirdreS: @edsai I took over “your” cube.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106435261013049344

2011-08-24 18:37:36

DeirdreS: @edsai Where are you?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106435002719404032

2011-08-24 17:33:29

DeirdreS: @elijahwright Hadn’t heard it, for all I knew I was making that up!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106418867882033152

2011-08-24 16:52:13

DeirdreS: @ryancnelson did you also keep both ears?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106408481598353408

2011-08-24 16:16:11

DeirdreS: Video: SmartOS: The Modern Operating System  – Bryan’s webinar from yesterday
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106399414943367169

2011-08-24 15:56:24

DeirdreS: RT @pingles: we’re kicking off a london node.js user group:  @teabass is organising, meet up in september
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106394434375139328

2011-08-24 11:10:44

“Thanks” and “sorry” are two simple words that can make a world of difference.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106322545313202177

2011-08-24 03:55:57

DeirdreS: Dad didn’t realize it himself, but when he played guitar, he always started with “The Sinking of the Reuben James”
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106213126776684544

2011-08-24 03:50:03

Peter Paul & Mary – Puff the Magic Dragon – YouTube
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106211644388020224

2011-08-24 03:22:08

“In spite of it all, I’m able to grin, and think of the places my get up has been”
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106204616055726081

2011-08-24 03:14:27

DeirdreS: But – what’s worse? A dad who went down fighting (and really thought he was immortal), or two mothers who decided to walk out of my life?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106202683039416320

2011-08-24 03:12:32

DeirdreS: I alternate periods of “Yes, I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be?” with “You tore my heart out and stomped that sucker flat.” Sometimes within 1 hr.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106202202875502592

2011-08-24 03:03:33

DeirdreS: @mtuckerb Wow, that close already?!? Excited for you guys. You are all very brave.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106199940748951553

2011-08-24 02:49:31

DeirdreS: Anchovies on toast, fresh tomatoes, Indian potatoes with spices, olives… international dinner! Oh, and Maker’s Mark 46.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106196408142532608

2011-08-23 22:59:35

DeirdreS: @vdotw Thanks. I’m sure it will lessen at some point, tho I have a feeling it’ll worsen first. Right now I’m probably still in shock.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106138545621708800

2011-08-23 22:54:50

DeirdreS: Kinda feel like a truck ran over me. Yes, I know this is all normal. Doesn’t make it any fun.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106137347330015233

2011-08-23 22:23:43

DeirdreS: RT @stevel: any systems developers (kernel/drivers) folks in the bay area looking for a super cool gig? my group at google is hiring.. …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106129517705310208

2011-08-23 21:01:23

DeirdreS: RT @SmugMug: The horror, the horror!  #BestEngagementPhotosEver
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106108798028099585

2011-08-23 20:21:37

DeirdreS: @manufloresv Sorry about that, we’ll see what we can do. Any ideas on a platform that would work for all?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106098788787175424

2011-08-23 19:23:52

DeirdreS: @linuxdaddy Realized the day I’m available is a bank holiday, dunno if most Londoners will be out of town?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106084255595102208

2011-08-23 18:44:51

DeirdreS: @shawnferry Yes, I missed a big one in CA years ago because I was driving. #Earthquake
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106074438608498688

2011-08-23 18:10:39

DeirdreS: @timkennedy Ah, that was you getting evacuated? There will be a recording. And you can always keep asking questions.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106065831275937792

2011-08-23 17:41:11

DeirdreS: @wrighty Yes, I expect very soon!
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106058416639840258

2011-08-23 17:38:11

DeirdreS: “SmartOS is usable for HPC, enterprise… many kinds of workloads.” Bryan Cantrill webinar
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106057662340399104

2011-08-23 17:37:18

DeirdreS: “SmartOS itself is entirely open source.” Bryan Cantrill webinar
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106057437785755649

2011-08-23 17:34:13

DeirdreS: “In SmartOS, if you break out of a virtual machine, you’ve only tunneled out to a larger, more secure cell.” Cantrill webinar bit.ly/oCTHOV
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106056660895801344

2011-08-23 17:32:08

DeirdreS: “Operators can decide where to virtualize in the stack, based on your needs. We give you the choice.” Bryan Cantrill webinar bit.ly/oCTHOV
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106056140034547712

2011-08-23 17:25:42

DeirdreS: @hudsonette Their taste in women seems somewhat similar.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106054520634740737

2011-08-23 17:21:18

DeirdreS: @sxa555 We’re all on Mac, FWIW
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106053412826783744

2011-08-23 17:20:43

DeirdreS: “In OS virtualization, the operator from the global zone has total visibility up and down the stack.” Bryan Cantrill webinar bit.ly/oCTHOV
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106053265107591168

2011-08-23 17:14:22

DeirdreS: “You can argue that those of us who write operating systems don’t know how to share very well.” Bryan Cantrill webinar
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106051666666729472

2011-08-23 17:08:25

DeirdreS: “DTrace helps you answer the age-old question: Why is my system sucking?”
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106050169191137280

2011-08-23 17:07:02

DeirdreS: “ZFS is the only enterprise-grade storage stack that is open source.” @bcantrill in webinar
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106049823341416449

2011-08-23 16:42:10

DeirdreS: starting soon! The complete operating system for cloud computing: Smart OS. Joyent VP Engineering Bryan Cantrill webinar http://t.co/AIPvQIZ
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106043563279785984

2011-08-23 15:02:12

DeirdreS: @erikbryn …and few people can afford them.
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106018407358537728

2011-08-23 15:00:43

DeirdreS: In London Sunday afternoon to Tuesday morning, who do I need to catch up with?
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106018034497490944

2011-08-23 14:57:51

DeirdreS: RT @SenatorSanders: “Since 1993, more than half of the nation’s income growth has been captured by the top 1% of earners.” – @TheAtlanti …
http://twitter.com/DeirdreS/statuses/106017311898611713

2011-08-23 01:21:54

My Dad’s Death

I haven’t been good at long-form personal communication in the last few years, partly for lack of leisure, partly because, well, these years have been rough on many fronts (outline here). But this seems like a time when telling everybody everything at once will be more efficient, and perhaps easier on me.

My father, Al Straughan, had long been ill – although, as he often emphasized, not with anything that was likely to kill him soon. In spite of 50 years of smoking, no exercise, and a lifetime of being overweight, he had a healthy heart, and there’s no family history of cancer. The lungs… not so good. In the last three years he was in the hospital just about every month with a lung infection, and the doctors seemed unable to find a root cause, except a general diagnosis of COPD.

Several years ago they did a bronchoscopy to examine an obstruction in his lung, and found a pea that Dad must have accidentally aspirated some time before. If you’re a fan of House, you may recall an episode in which a patient coughed up part of a lung for exactly this reason. Dad’s bronchi were weakened or damaged as a result, so a stent was put in at that time. (I may be getting the details wrong because I was usually not geographically close, and such a lot happened that it was hard to keep track.)

Dad had been living in the UK for at least 15 years with his third wife, Ruth, who is British. They met in Jakarta around 1987 or ’88 – he was there on a contract job, she was working for the Hilton hotel chain as a trainer (Ruth, forgive me if I get these details wrong, too). They met at a party when Dad walked up to her and said: “For once, I’d like to dance with a woman I can look in the eye.” Ruth is 6′ tall, Dad was 6’3″.

They came together to my wedding to Enrico in 1989, and soon thereafter moved to Texas, then the Maldives, then “home” to the UK (though Ruth had been away as much as there: she’d lived in Hong Kong for 15 years, then Bali…). As it turned out, the UK, with its National Health System, was the best possible place for them. Though Dad never became a citizen nor even had time to contribute much to the national coffers, the NHS took excellent and expensive care of him. There were a few procedures they chose to pay for privately to shorten wait time when Dad was in pain, but the NHS did most of it, and bore most of the cost. I am deeply grateful for this, and wish we had a national health system here in the US – it’s a matter of social justice.

Dad’s other area of health troubles was arthritis. Being overweight and never having exercised routinely contributed to the degeneration of his bones and joints such as we all suffer as we get older. He had his first knee surgery to clean up damaged cartilage in 1982, and his first knee replacement far earlier than doctors usually like to do them: the artificial joint wears out and will eventually need to be replaced again, and this is major surgery. Over the years they replaced the other knee, had to do repair work on one or both at least once, and one of these surgeries resulted in Dad being in intensive care. He had other surgeries to try to alleviate pain that was being “referred” from his deteriorating spinal column all over his body. Recently they tried implanting electrodes in his spinal cord which he could activate using a device outside his body, to interrupt the pain signals before they reached his brain. Apparently these devices are hard to tune; it was never wholly successful in stopping the pain, which was at times so severe as to keep him confined to bed. He had been effectively disabled by pain for over 10 years.

For most of this time, I was living relatively nearby in Italy, and could get over for visits fairly often, especially once the era of low-cost airlines began (I am grateful to them, too). Those of us who have internationally-scattered families know the pains of being far away when a loved one needs us. There was one week in which my mother, in Iowa, was having a large tumor removed from her ovary, and Dad, in the UK, was having yet another major operation that could have landed him in intensive care again. I chose to stay in Europe in case Dad needed me. Mom was attended by her sister, and her tumor turned out to be benign, but she never forgave me for not being with her – one of the causes of our eventual estrangement.

In 2008 I moved to the US, and visits to Dad and Ruth became fewer. I stopped by on my way to India on my last major trip for Sun Microsystems in March, 2010, then did not travel overseas for over a year. I was finally able to see them again this June, when Joyent sent me to Italy, so I extended the trip a bit and popped up to the UK for a weekend.

I can’t say that the deterioration I saw in June was shocking; I had known most of what was going on with him (I assume), and could observe some for myself in the many phone calls during which he was coughing, quickly out of breath, or simply too tired for sustained conversation. But I was deeply saddened. Caring for him had become a full-time job for him and Ruth both. His world had shrunk to their small home, sometimes just the bedroom, and the TV. This seemed cruel for a man who had lived large, hard, and adventurously all over the world in his 72 years.

I was also concerned for Ruth, who had been his only caregiver in all this time. There was little I could do to help from Italy. Again, international divides complicate everything: neither Dad nor I was living in our passport country, and by the time I moved back to the US, he was uninsurable here and could not risk even a visit to his beloved birthplace, New Orleans. This is why I give very short shrift to the brainwashed Americans who shriek: “Socialized medicine is evil! It’s not the American way!” Justice for all? Yeah. Tell me how it is right that my father could not afford to visit his native country before he died. Then go fuck yourselves.

We all knew that this June’s visit might be the last time I would see my father. I didn’t (and still don’t) understand what all was going on, but he was clearly going downhill, and he even stated baldly that, whenever he did go, there likely wouldn’t be time for me to arrive at his bedside. But he also told me that one of his doctors had said there was no reason he couldn’t live another 15 years. Then, at another moment, he mentioned that he had looked into assisted suicide in Switzerland, but could not afford it. This was all confusing, though understandable. I can’t know for sure how I would react in his situation, and I shudder to think of becoming as reduced and confined as he was. I thought of my aunt Rosie, who told me in January of 2006 that she had had enough (after 10 years of severe health problems) and was ready to go. I had replied: “I will miss you terribly, but if you feel it’s time, you should go.” She died in late March of that year.

Last weekend I was in Austin to catch up with an old school friend who was visiting mutual friends, and for my daughter Rossella’s birthday. My brother Ian also lives in Austin.

I received email from Ruth letting me know that Dad was in hospital again, with what seemed to be yet another by-now-routine lung infection. Ruth and I spoke on Sunday; he was wearing an oxygen mask and unable to talk on the phone. The doctors were not happy with his oxygen levels, and could not get them up.

That evening (would have been the deep of night in the UK), Ruth called again. He was hemorrhaging from his lungs for unknown reasons (they suspected the stent may have got misplaced) and not expected to live til morning.

I called Ross and Ian, we sat together and talked and drank for a while, but there wasn’t anything we could do, even for each other. I guess I slept a bit that night, probably not much.

The next day Ruth reported that he had regained consciousness sufficiently to let her and the doctors know that he wanted to fight for his life. We should have expected that, I suppose – going gently was just not in his character. Later that day he was transferred by ambulance to a lung hospital some distance away. He survived the trip, and another night passed in observation (and no sleep for anybody).

Tuesday he was “well” enough for an exploratory bronchoscopy. They found that the stent had indeed moved, in a way that would require surgery under general anesthesia to fix. His other lung was also “compromised”. His condition was such that he might not survive anesthesia and, even if he did, would be on a respirator. It was kinder to opt for palliative treatment and let him slip quietly away, which he did Tuesday evening, with Ruth beside him.

Ross, Ian and I will be flying over in the next week for a funeral with our English family and friends. Sometime later in the year, we will arrange a jazz funeral and burial of his ashes in New Orleans, I hope in St Roch cemetery where his parents are. It should be one hell of a party. We hope all those who knew and loved Al will be able to join us.

My eternal gratitude goes to Ruth, who (besides being a wonderful person whom I’d love anyway) did so much for him, for so long. Not out of any spirit of self-sacrifice, but because she loved him. We could all count ourselves fortunate to be loved so well. I hope that now the rest of us will have a chance to do some things for her.


photos and other memorabilia here

Al Straughan, 1939-2011

“It’s showtime, folks!” Dad was a huge fan of Bob Fosse, and musical theater in general.

Tribute from his friend Celeste:
“Al had a positive optimism that permeated his life and work. No matter how sick he was, he always looked toward the future. He was a nurturing person who never foresook the maternal within his masculinity. We had a fantastic time together from 1959 through 1965 as the twin nexus of a group of wild scholars romping through LSU in Baton Rouge, the City of New Orleans and the Louisiana countryside with imperial abandon but doing no harm. Alton and I lost touch around 1970 to find each other again in 1992. Since then our friendship illuminated my adult life. He was a linguist, a helpful consultant to developing communities throughout the world with the US foreign service and independently, a true mystic, artist and writer. It’s hard to believe we’ll never again engage in stimulating arguments over the nature of the world and spirit or in gut-busting reminiscences of the past.”
Celeste’s visit to England (pdf with photos)

More reminiscences on Al in the comments below, and here and here.