Customs and Etiquette When Dining Out in Italy

House Wine

In many Italian restaurants, you can get a low-cost house wine (usually one white and one red selection) in carafes of 1/4, 1/2, or a full litre. In some places this is a decent though not stellar local wine, in others it will be something completely unrelated to the area. Personally, I’d try something local, even if you have to buy a whole bottle – local wines are part of the authentic Italian food experience. And sometimes the house wine is very special indeed.

The house wine does not necessarily have a lower alcohol content than what you get in bottles; it has whatever alcohol content is normal for that type of wine.


Is a Pizza a Meal?

A normal Italian pizza is just right for one hungry person to eat – the size of a 12-14″ plate. True Italian pizza, at least in northern Italy, bears little relation to the huge thick globby thing they call pizza in the US and, for my money, the Italian version is a lot better. It’s a thin crust with a thin layer of tomato sauce and mozzarella (usually) plus whatever else you order on it – every pizzeria has a long list of options from the classic to the bizarre, but usually you can subtract ingredients just by asking. In the better pizzerie, pizza is cooked in a wood-fired oven. Don’t settle for anything less.

Italians don’t often drink beer with meals, except with pizza. Beer may be on tap or in bottles, and is served by volume (piccola, media, grande).

About Water

Aqua gassata (pronounced “gazata”) or frizzante (“fritz-antay”) has bubbles, naturale or non-gassata does not. While tap water is safe to drink all over Italy, Italians usually drink bottled water because they prefer the taste (not because the restaurants are looking for an excuse to make you pay more). You can insist on tap water, but be aware that in most parts of Italy it is very hard (lots of calcium), and you may not like the flavor. In some mountain locales where the local water is very good, they serve that in carafes for free. Anywhere else, it can be difficult to get tap water brought to your table, but, if you want to try, ask for acqua del rubinetto.

No, gassata is not the default choice, unless for some reason your waiter has preconceived notions about foreigners. The Italian population splits pretty evenly on the gas or no-gas preference, so why would any waiter assume otherwise?

Dining “al Fresco”

NB: To an Italian, al fresco is slang for being in jail!

Weather and facilities permitting, the waiter may ask if you prefer to sit indoors or outdoors. If you want to smoke with your meal, outdoors may be your only option nowadays. Prices should be the same for a sit-down meal no matter where you sit.

Sitting or Standing

At many/most bars you will be charged more if you occupy a table, even if you fetch your drinks/snacks from the bar yourself. Bars care about rapid turnover, so they charge you more for table service. It’s a conflict of interest between tourists wanting a place to sit down and rest their feet while enjoying the human scenery around them, and bars needing to make money from the space they’re sitting in. The more desirable the location (e.g., Saint Mark’s Square in Venice), the more ridiculous the price of a cup of coffee at a table. If you just want coffee, have it standing up at a little bar on a side street. If you want to rest your feet and enjoy the view, be prepared to pay for that.

Cover and Service Charges and Tipping

Most restaurants charge coperta (the term actually refers to the place setting), a minimal (1-3 euro) cover charge which includes the cost of bread, table settings, etc. Most do not charge for service, and Italians tip only minimally. Waiting tables is a trained and valued job in Italy, and waiters make decent salaries. Of course they do appreciate any tip that you leave but, unless you’re spending more than 50 euros a head on a meal, a tip of more than 5 euros is extravagant. I usually leave 1-2 euros plus whatever loose change I want to get rid of. (NB: In the US I tip very well – several of my friends worked their way through college on tips!)

Paying the Bill

Getting the bill in an Italian restaurant can actually be an ordeal. Unlike many American restaurants, Italian restaurants are usually in no hurry to get rid of you (and most Italians would react very badly to a restaurant trying to rush them out). I don’t know why, but it can take forever to get the bill. Maybe it’s because only the restaurant owner has access to the cash register, and he/she may be busy chatting with regular customers.

Note: Restaurant recommendations are here.

La Scala Re-Opening

I haven’t been following the Muti-La Scala fight closely, but I do have a bit of inside information. The New York Times said:

“MR. MUTI had reason for optimism. He had just presided over what was widely proclaimed the cultural event of the year in Europe on Dec. 7, the reopening of La Scala after a three-year restoration and renovation. The project had encountered protests from preservationists and the usual construction delays, but the finished house was widely regarded as a masterpiece, with its new stage contraptions functioning smoothly and its venerable décor glistening afresh.”

Uh, yeah, right. The finished house was not finished. The glistening decor had been hastily cleaned of construction dust, dangling wires tucked away, etc., for the big opening-night performance. Stagehands nearly lost limbs operating the new and unfamiliar stage contraptions, but, from the audience’s point of view, everything did run smoothly.

Performances then moved right back to the Teatro degli Arcimboldi, where they have been held since the La Scala restoration began, and will continue to be held until it is truly finished. The grand opening night marking its completion was, appropriately enough, a messinscena (mise en scéne).

Gardening: In Italy, a Man’s Home is His Orto

^ Fresh produce from our garden. The zucchine aren’t supposed to be that shape; they had long skinny ends which I cut off because they were rotting; the uneven growth might be due to uneven watering (we’re still learning). I also need to learn to look more closely at the tomatoes before I cut them. But it makes a visually interesting assortment.

Our new home has a bit of land around it, so, for the first time in 30 years, I can plant in something bigger than a windowbox. There’s a lot to do to turn this mess into a garden, however – the previous owners neglected it terribly. For starters, since we moved here I’ve grubbed up several hundred kilos of dandelions and other weeds from the lawn. (I don’t mind. I find weeding therapeutic during times of frustration, such as phone calls to Telecom Italia.)

I planted bulbs back in October, in the bare patches left after the dandelions were removed, so we have cheerful clumps of daffodils, with hyacinths, tulips, and irises coming along later. My weeding activities have given the lawn a mangy look, but I’m reseeding it with grass and wildflowers.

Measured horizontally, our backyard would be about 10 by 12 meters. But we’re on a slope – in its natural state, this land would be almost vertical, so when the house was built, the land got terraced. There’s a piece of flat yard extending about four meters from the door of our basement-level den out towards the lake, then there’s a six-meter drop. The mass of earth (building rubble and very clayey soil) is kept in place by a stack of open cinder blocks, mostly filled with rocks and weeds (yes, my fellow Woodstockers, we have our very own khud!). There’s another three-meter terrace of flat land below, then it drops three meters (more cinder blocks) to a tiny strip (1/2 meter) of dirt abutting the neighbors’ fence. All this is traversed by a narrow staircase of more cinder blocks.

What to do with this peculiar arrangement? The top level we’ll mostly keep clear, in hopes of eventually having a lawn worth enjoying. And lawn chairs – it gets lots of sun. We’ve planted ten rose bushes along the low fence that stops people falling down to the terrace below, and yesterday I put up a low enclosure for the turtles. (Predictably, they spent most of the time trying to get out of it.) After I decide exactly where I want that to be permanently placed, we’ll put in a little pond so that they can stay out there full-time when the weather’s warm enough.

The terrace below is in the process of becoming a vegetable garden (orto). For this, I have help. We had scarcely moved into the new house last September when Mimma (the wonderful Sicilian lady who cleans and irons for us) brought her husband Domenico to have a look. Retired from factory work, Domenico is a keen gardener, maintaining their own orto somewhere near Lecco, as well as gardening for several other people.

Domenico is a very practical man: his first suggestion was to plow up everything, including the top level, and make it all into orto. I resisted this – I want a place to lounge in the sun, when I have time for such things. (And can stop myself leaping up to dig, plant, or weed.) We do have a patch of herbs in the corner by the garage, and I’ve planted green beans on the other side of the fence where the roses are (there’s just enough space between fence and drop for me to walk along). This may be unorthodox, but legumes fix nitrogens in the soil (so I’ve read), so they should be good for the roses, and of course they can climb the fence.

green bug on purple iris

Down below, I’ve already planted various salad greens, with parsely, basil, and coriander in alternate rows. I am reading up on organic gardening, trying to find natural preventatives and remedies – it seems silly to go to all the trouble of planting our own veggies, and then have to spray them with nasty chemicals and wonder what we’re eating. So far I’ve read that garlic and other “smelly” plants help discourage bugs; I’ve planted garlic around the roses. I’m growing marigolds from seeds and will transplant them out to the orto when they’re bigger, as they, too, are said to have a bug-scaring smell. And nasturtiums, which not only smell bad to bugs, but can be eaten by humans (both flowers and leaves, in salads).

In a few weeks, when the weather is truly warm, we’ll buy vegetable plants – eggplant, tomatoes, zucchine, cucumbers, peppers – which Domenico will come plant for me. Yesterday he brought some sapling trees from his own orto (two figs, four hazelnuts) which he planted along the bottom of the first retaining wall; when they get bigger, they may help prevent a landslide. This whole hillside used to be a hazelnut orchard, and the neighbors still have some very nice trees, but our property was completely deforested by someone stupid, and is therefore prone to slippage.

The rows of cinder blocks are offset from each other and stick out just enough to make little planters, so I’m slowly filling them up with odds and ends: two miniature carnation plants, small succulents that will expand to fill their spaces, and wild strawberries. The property is full of strawberry plants, but they have a tendency to grow where they will get stepped on, so I’m transplanting them to the cinder blocks, which should make perfect strawberry planters.

…and I could go on all day, obviously. I’d forgotten how much I love gardening, it’s been so long since I had a real opportunity to do it. I like watching things grow. And having an orto is very much an Italian tradition – anyone who has a patch of land, no matter how small, plants things that they can eat. Part of eating good food is having it fresh, and it doesn’t get any fresher than right out of your own garden. I’m looking forward to putting own on produce on our dining table this summer!

May 11, 2005

I should have been grateful for the unusually long winter. Now spring has set in with a vengeance, and with it, allergies. We had a beautiful weekend, and I would have loved to be out gardening, but I was stuck in my room with my clean-air machine, taking allergy pills and eyedrops (probably more of both than I should), and nonetheless in sneezing, eye-burning misery. Oh, well. At least I have a nice view of all the burgeoning greenery from my window…

Down Memory Lane in a Corporate T-Shirt

One of the perks of working in high tech during the boom years was that you could wear jeans and polo shirts to the office every day, and you didn’t even have to pay for the shirts – someone was always giving you clothing.

If you represented your company at a show or conference, they wanted you “in uniform,” so they gave you a new shirt. My first was the infamous Adaptec polo shirt, purple with a turquoise placket and navy collar. I still have it, but don’t wear it much, because, like most of the shirts Adaptec gave me, it was too big.

Another polo shirt I received was embroidered to commemorate a project I hadn’t known I was participating in, something to do with an upgrade of the Adaptec network. As far as I was concerned, I had been helping out my buddies in IT by playing around with cool new stuff, so I was surprised to get a shirt about it. They swore they had even asked me what size I wanted (if they had, I would have asked for a small).

I was informally part of Adaptec’s web team, so I got a fleece jacket to commemorate the relaunch of the company website, in fall 1997 according to the embroidery. The jackets were commissioned prematurely, however – as I recall, the site didn’t actually go live til about six months later.

Let’s see, what else is in the closet? Another fleece, this one from a conference we hosted for our European distributors in Marbella. Nicer quality of fleece, but no pockets! A long-sleeved polo shirt from something else, too big as usual, and in a horrid shade of green.

Various baseball caps, pity I don’t wear them very often. My favorite is one that an IT buddy was given by UUNet, which he graciously passed on to me – if I’m going to wear a baseball cap at all, I want it to be as geeky as possible. The best-looking cap I have is naturally from ATG – Art Technology Group, a company that prided itself on its fine design sense (one of my Woodstock classmates was its CEO at the time).

I have t-shirts from various companies, but I never wore them in the office, nor much on the street in Italy. On one of our Caribbean vacations, a company logo t-shirt I happened to be wearing actually accomplished its advertising purpose. We went horseback riding on the beach. After an hour riding behind me and looking at my Toast + Jam t-shirt, a guy in the group with us asked me what it was about. I explained, and he said “Oh, I could use that.” Turns out he was a musician, and liked the idea of being able to create his own CDs of his work.

I get more wear out of the long-sleeved Ts, from Hewlett-Packard (wore that one out, in fact) and Roxio, and a nice black turtleneck from Roxio Germany commemorating WinOnCD 6 (for which I wrote the manual). Thanks to friends, I still enjoy some of my old industry perks: I recently received three black turtlenecks embroidered with “Roxio – a division of Sonic Solutions”. Come to think of it, my collection of shirts spans most of the history of the CD recording software industry.

My all-time favorite remains the denim shirt pictured here. It’s a little big, but just comfortably so, enough to wear over a long-sleeve knit shirt in spring. The embroidery was designed by a tattoo artist: a burning heart with “Born 2 Burn” inscribed on a banner wrapped around it. A couple of years later, after several changes of the guard at Adaptec/Roxio, I was wearing it the day I met our new CEO, Chris Gorog. He commented on the shirt, and I passed along the observation that one of the engineers had made about the tattoo design: “If you turn it upside down, it looks like a flaming asshole.” Which probably sealed my doom with Mr. Gorog. Oh, well. Perhaps he and I were never destined to get along in the first place.

Win Some, Lose Some

Since my whine about our iPod troubles , I’ve received several offers to help solve the problems, as well as several other stories of customer dissatisfaction with the iPod. So I should follow up.

Rossella’s friend who also has an iPod was able to load new tracks onto hers, which told me that the iPod itself was okay, and sending it back to Apple would be useless. The problem is evidently between my computer and the iPod, although that doesn’t explain why the Mac I borrowed couldn’t see the iPod, either. To charge Ross’ iPod, we continued plugging it into the FireWire cable attached to my Windows PC, so I was happily surprised when, on its return from the friend, the iPod was again recognized by Windows. Maybe it suddenly realized it was supposed to accept new songs as well as play old ones. I hastened to load it up with music before it changed its mind. Since then, the connection between the iPod and my computer has been erratic, but generally available.

The new problem is that the battery doesn’t last long. I’ve been over to the Apple support site for advice, and it looks as if I’ll have to do some testing to determine to Apple’s satisfaction that there really is a problem before I try to send it in for warranty repair. A friend is seeing short battery life with her own much newer iPod, too. I do note on the site that Apple has halved the scandalous price they were charging to replace out-of-warranty batteries, to “only” $99 plus shipping. But there are ways to do it more cheaply, and, once it’s out of warranty, you might as well.

later: iPod battery problem solved!

Deirdré Straughan on Italy, India, the Internet, the world, and now Australia